On Empathy

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (SunnyMary) — Sat, 05 May 2007 22:21:36 GMT

I've waited since January for the appointment. I was in and out of the Doctor's office in 5 minutes. He didn't even look at me while I was there,

Jilly, that makes me so mad!!!! Is there anyone you can complain to about this? How are you supposed to get "treatment" when they don't even...

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (jillybromley) — Wed, 02 May 2007 22:36:27 GMT

Dear SunnyMary

I'm so happy for you that you have found this wonderful Doctor ....

It makes all the difference in the world to have someone who actually listesns to you and understands what you are going through.

I went to the hospital about my foot (can't walk without acute pain). I've waited since January for the appointment. I was in and out of the Doctor's office in 5 minutes. He didn't even look at me while I was there, and all...

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (SunnyMary) — Wed, 02 May 2007 18:52:42 GMT

You all have made some really good points. Jilly, I really like how you put it:

It needs a caring perspective of mind to be able to empathise, and an unselfishness of spirit, because empathy can only occur when our full focus and attention is upon the person concerned and we are truly listening to them.

Listening with our ears, picks up the words.
Listening with our heart, picks up...

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (kiturah) — Tue, 01 May 2007 18:16:51 GMT

I'm not quite sure. It is hard to pick apart. Empathy and knowledge are hard to pick apart.
Experiential knowledge is incredibly useful, probably more useful than empathy in most cases. But you can't always get that. And a low empathetic person (doctor) may deny that another person with the same disease can have different symptoms than herself.

My private doc isn't bad, but he told my husband who completed a rib fracture, that he broke a rib and didn't...

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (MoodyBelgium) — Sat, 28 Apr 2007 20:53:08 GMT

I agree with the author, BUT... my own neurologist has MS too and it is my experience that he understands my medical problems better than my previous neurologist, although she was a very good doctor too. This guy, who has had MS for some time, asks very specific questions and can relate better to the pain problems I have, which many other neurologists still ignore. I once had the head neurologist of the MS clinic tell me that MS does not cause pain!

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (cwavra) — Sat, 28 Apr 2007 11:44:29 GMT

Empathy is important, but I agree it doesn't always come from first hand experience. I have only one one unusual request when I choose a doctor. He/she must be younger than me & older than my children.

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (shadeaux63) — Wed, 25 Apr 2007 12:15:51 GMT

One has to wonder how a doctor can even get into medicine without a certain amount of empathy.I mean, you would think they want to practice medicine out of a desire to help people.But, I swear, I believe more get into it thinking it's a great way to make a lot of money, without any real concern for the people they have to deal with.I know there are exceptions, but they're SO hard to find.

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (Rockerwoman) — Wed, 25 Apr 2007 11:59:36 GMT

Mary,I can answer this thru working with the Dr's I do,even some nurses.They don't understand,until they have been thru it themselves.

I know a few dr's who have had some major surgery and now they are more prone in giving pt's pain med's without pt's begging.

Good article and Question to ask..

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (jillybromley) — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 14:42:46 GMT

Yes, such a good article ...

I'm sure it's not necessary to have been through the same occurance in order to be able to empathise.

I worked for the Samaritans (a suicide helpline) for many years and it was not necessary for me to have ever been suicidal, or to have attempted suicide myself, in order to be able to empathise with all that these distressed souls were going through....

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (shadeaux63) — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 12:00:12 GMT

I do agree with the author. I've had a few very sympathetic/empathetic doctors in my life who hadn't experienced anything close to what I was dealing with.Yet, on the othert hand, I have also had a few who I thought would be great, because they HAD been through what I was going through-and they were very UNsympathetic.And not just with the fibro.After several horrible hospital experiences with childbirth, I chose a doctor when I was pregnant with my 4th child who had started out as a...

Re: On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (ponolops) — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 10:47:27 GMT

Mary, Hi!
I read the article and must admit that I agree with everything that was said. Empathy is something we are all given, although some people never use it. A good doctor (and mine is) can empathise with everything their patient tells them, even though they have never suffered in the same way. Years ago, when I lived in Buckinghamshire, my GP sent me to a spinal specialist who had spinal problems himself, although different to mine. My GP thought that he might empathise more with...

On Empathy

feeds@yuku.com (SunnyMary) — Tue, 24 Apr 2007 06:43:37 GMT

We think a lot about empathy on this board, both in terms of supporting each other and in terms of the constant search for supportive, understanding health care professionals. For that reason, I found this article in The New York Times on empathy really interesting.

Understanding Empathy: Can You Feel My Pain?
by Richard A. Friedman, MD